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Friday, December 01, 2006

Editorial 8 Issue 1300!

Two essays down, two to go. Counting down the days till Christmas... hope you enjoy this.


STUDENT JUMPS ON BANDWAGON

A university student has taken the decision to jump on a bandwagon, Redbrick has learnt.

Michael Ovine, a 19-year-old student from Newcastle, jumped on the bandwagon at approximately 4:32 pm on Wednesday afternoon this week. He was not injured in the incident.

University staff first heard of the occurrence when a group of witnesses outside the Guild reported seeing a large bandwagon passing by and claimed that a fellow student had managed to land on it by leaping from a nearby wall.

It is believed the wagon was travelling slowly enough for pedestrians to jump onto it, a tactic often adopted to allow people to join with relative ease. Eyewitness reports described the vehicle as brightly-coloured, with flags, bunting and ribbons festooning its exterior.

Mr Ovine commented, from his position atop the wagon, "It just looked so great. Everyone on it was having a good time, and I knew a lot of them, so I thought, why not? If everyone else is enjoying it, maybe I will too. Now I can look down on all those who haven't yet joined this bandwagon and pity them for not having the awareness that I did."

When questioned further as to his motives for jumping on the bandwagon, the second year Economics student insisted that he had only joined because of heartfelt personal beliefs and definitely not anything else. "I've really thought about this," he revealed, "There are really good reasons for joining this particular bandwagon. Sure, I've joined others in the past, but I'm really passionate about this one. Everyone else should get involved too. This stuff is really important."

It is not yet certain what the 'stuff' in question is. Rumours are spreading that the purpose of the bandwagon could be irrelevant or even pointless. Others believe the propaganda spread by the bandwagon drivers to be at best misleading, at worst a deliberate ploy to emotionally manipulate people in order to achieve their own ends.

One thing, though, is certain. The manoeuvre executed by Mr Ovine this week is not a solitary one. At least two other bandwagons have been spotted on campus since he took this action, a dramatic increase on the last few weeks' bandwagon statistics.

The biggest bandwagon sighted in the last year has been that which was parked on campus during the National Blood Service's visit to the University. Although many have opposed that wagon, it continues to function and carries a faithful group of supporters around the city in its mission to spread hyperbole and false accusation.

Other bandwagons were seen during Mr Galloway MP's visit to campus. Two duelling bandwagons hovered for several hours near Waterstone's at University Centre. This bandwagon came under criticism by many. It appeared to be one of the more common varieties of bandwagon; the "knee-jerk reaction" bandwagon v.1.2.

In order to protect students against unsafe bandwagons, the Society Against Unhinged Bandwagons is mounting a campaign to raise awareness of the dangers involved in jumping on just any old bandwagon. Spokesperson Anne-Marie Pensively today made a statement condemning reckless bandwagon drivers. She said, "It is important that students think through all the issues involved in joining a bandwagon before they take this decision.

A lot of them do not realise that some of these wagons are intent on filtering information in order to get more people to join their cause; this is particularly true of the "we-only-tell-you-one-side-of-the-coin" bandwagon, whose target audience is primarily students."

Historically, bandwagons have always been an important part of student life, and tend to gather in groups at events such as the NUS conference and even occasionally Guild Council.

Redbrick will continue to report all campus bandwagon incidents in a totally unbiased manner in order to keep our readers aware of the situation.

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1 Comments:

  • Who is this aimed at by the way? And what are you trying to say? That all student campaigns and political actions are bandwagon jumps? Seems a bit harsh. ;-) If that is what you're saying, it is rather cynical of you! I thought you were above such things as cynicism. Redbrick unbiased? ;-) Give over ;-)

    By Blogger Julien, at 10:55 pm  

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